hoax winners for the 1st I'm so Gullible I Believed Captain Kangaroo hoax email contest

Submitted by: "larry refsland"
I found this article tucked in the middle of the variety section of the Mpls Star/Trib. I'm wondering why it hasn't been covered in the celebrity starved nightly news. It's really surprising if it's true. Larry

Please read! Dumb blondes not so dumb?

AP-Paris Hilton and Brittney Spears are not often thought of as deep thinkers. However, these two party girls have recently hooked up to start a “think tank” of sorts. The Hilton-Spears Study for the Advancement of Humanity formed under their tutelage to call on such luminaries as Senator Hillary Clinton, former Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Conner, Martha Stewart and others. The group has been meeting regularly, according to sources, to discuss solutions to poverty in America and human rights around the world. Even though Senator Clinton declined to comment about her involvement with the two famous blondes, she did admit she was amazed at the mental capacity they showed during a joint appearance at MTV’s award program. “These girls are not all beauty and no brains,” Clinton remarked.

SECOND PLACE: Jason R.
Most jaded, Best use of unoriginal material

Submitted by: "Jason R.
Those of you that know me know I hate forwards, and never send them on, but...this is totally for real!

Most major web advertising companies are located in Gertie, Oklahoma people like Clear Channel, Formant, Adores, etc. They have come up with a great way to get their clients product out into your emails, and you can profit from it. Last year was the first year they tried this and it was a great success, now they are doing it again! They are asking people to submit hoax emails that compel people to forward them, and then they use the best ones to send out to the general public, attaching their clients advertising. You don't have to win to get money; there are cash prizes all the way down to 100th place!

Even if they don't use your email they will pay you a dollar for every time you forward this email.

Last year my friend entered this contest and won a hundred bucks!

READ BELOW!

-----Original Message-----
From: GERTIE ADVERTISING FIRMS [mailto:gertieok@...]
Subject: HOAX EMAIL CONTEST 2006!

so, i hereby announce the annual...
GERTIE OKLAHOMA HOAX EMAIL CONTEST
RULES:

• put together an email full of "lies" in the hopes of making other people believe them and feel compelled to send them forward
• at the bottom of the hoax email type "GOHEC" (GERTIE OKLAHOMA HOAX EMAIL CONTEST) and your email address.
• PLUS!!! Forward this email on and you will earn $1.00 for every forward you send!

Thank you to all of our contestants for making this a fun, humorous, and insightful contest. We hope you enter again next time!

hoax email entries

My name is Anita Brake and I am writing to ask for your help. Several years ago my son's pet parrot, Qupie, was abducted by a parrotophile. After years of living in a cage and being fed only seeds Qupie is home, safe and sound. Since his return he has manifested some disturbing behaviors and we are at our wits end on how to cure his behaviors, he repeats the phrase "Polly wants a cracker" over and over again. We certainly did not teach him this behavior and want this constant reminder of those years of agonizing lose removed.

This brings me to my request. We don't have enough money to have Qupie retrained and are pleading with everyone to help out in any way possible to help us put this terrible chapter behind us. Please help Qupie and our family by sending as much as you can spare to:
The Qupie Rescue Fund
5555 Any St.
Someplace, USA

May God bless you for your generosity.

Anita Brake

Submitted by: "Maryam Ibrahim"
Hello,

My name is Mrs Maryam Ibrahim,owner of MARYAM IBRAHIM TEXTILES TRADING, TAILORING & EMBROIDERY Po Box 34285 Dubai,United Arab Emirates.Am 58years old, suffering from long time cancer of the breast. From all indications my condition is really deteriorating and it's quite obvious that I won't live more than 2 months according to my doctors. This is because the cancer stage has gotten to a very bad stage.

My late husband died early last year from heart attack, and during the period of our marriage we couldn't produce any child. My late husband was very wealthy and after his death,I inherited all his business and wealth.The doctor has advised me that I will not live for more than 2 months, so I have now decided to spread all my wealth, to contribute mainly to the development of charity in Africa, America, Asia and Europe.

Before my late husband died he was a major oil tycoon, in dubai and deposited the sum of 20 million dollars (Twenty million dollars) in a security company in europe some years ago,thats all i have left now,i need you to collect this funds and distribute it yourself to charity. so that when i die my soul can rest in peace. the funds will be entirely in hands and management. I pray God gives you the wisdom to touch very many lives,that is my main concern.

20% of this money will be for your time and effort, while 80% goes to charity.

God bless you. Mrs. Maryam Ibrahim.

NOTE!! I received this email, addressed to hoax@isgibck.com, but I don't think she was trying to enter the hoax contest. My reply:

Thank you for entering the I'm so Gullible I Believed Captain Kangaroo Contest.

I thought your hoax email was absolutely hilarious!!

I think it's GREAT that you've made it past the 2 month mark. I found your same hoax email online, dated in August!

Glory be to God--you're still alive!!

So what happened to the money? Who did you send it to? Or are you still looking for someone?

HAHAH!! So funny!

But now, seriously. Try a new hoax, please.

Thanks!
Gertie

Submitted by: "gertieok"
Re: Check out CNN Daily News Clips:Obama Gossip

i don't normally don't get caught up in the news-y articles on the net, but now with an upcoming election, i couldn't resist. fascinated to find this:

THE DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF BIAS
by Kathy Lucas

A recent study by students of Reed College proves that regardless of political party, you're doomed to be biased when it comes to the opposing party. In an effort to test a political perception, a group of students at Reed (Portland, OR) gathered volunteers from surrounding communities for a massive experiment.

Some 500 volunteers were asked to leave their true political standing at the door of the large cafetorium that served as a political laboratory. Then, volunteers were randomly given name-tags indicating whether they were Democrats or Republicans. Various tasks were assigned, ranging from "Make a shopping list," to "Fill out a Job Application." Volunteers were instructed to do the assignment as if they held the political beliefs of their name-tag.

The "Reedies" were shocked and amused at the results. One shopping list by a "Republican" read:
-white bread (use buy 1, get 1 free coupon)
-steak
-milk
-ammunition

"My favorite shopping list," remarks Anita Lovoe, "was by a Dem. It went on and on about needing to buy books for the 'Read to Children' charity, and rice to send to Africa. I thought it was a true reflection on Dems."

The experiment lasted a day, but it took several weeks to compile the results. The sophomores of the Humanities 202 class at Reed College conclude that not only are Democrats and Republicans biased against each other, but both Democrats and Republicans have stereotypes about themselves!

To see the complete study visit: http://isgibck.com

Submitted by: "larry refsland"
I was at a seminar last night and I thought I would pass along some info that I learned that could save your life! According to the speaker, who was a former terrorist that recently got escaped the cell he was part of when he became convinced the propaganda they were feeding him was bull, the way to thwart a terrorist takeover of an airplane is as follows: When you recognize or become aware the plane is about to be taken over start chanting: "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean, My Bonnie Lies Over the Sea." This confuses them because it is code for "abort the plan, live to fight another day." There were several other good tips he gave like the one about scrambling their cell phones by pressing 911 over and over again. If you care about your loved ones that are planning to fly this holiday season, forward this message to them now.

Submitted by: "larry refsland"
The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, along with activist group PETA have bestowed the world's tallest man with honorary memberships to their organizations. Bao XiShun, a 55 year old man from China is currently the tallest man alive at 7 feet 9 inches. He is credited with single-handedly saving two dolphins that were near death from eating plastic from the pool they are held in. When all other attempts had failed, officials asked Bao-XiShun to use his bare hand and long reach to fetch the plastic parts from inside the dolphins stomachs. Because of his willingness and his success he has been honored with lifelong memberships in the two well known organizations. "He is like a person with superhuman abilities because of his height," said Ingrid Newkirk president of PETA. "We hope he continues to use his powers to help animals in need."

Submitted by: "b.k."
It was back in about 96 and Shirley and I were traveling in our motor home near Oklahoma City. The radio had been giving tornado warnings all day and the sky was dark and threatening. It was on Friday and, as was our practice, we tried never to travel on the week-ends. We found a State Park and we camped on a pretty lake, without electric power, to spend the week-end.

It was particularly hot and humid; the sky was still dark and threatening and as we prepared for bed we opened the windows located on opposite walls of the bedroom. We were awakened by a clap of real close thunder; one where the lightning was still showing even before the roar of the thunder began. The wind was blowing extremely hard; the motor home rocked on it's jacks. As we watched the lightning show it dawned on us that the bedroom windows were wide open.

I rushed to close them and much to my surprise, the wind was blowing the drapes so hard that they were sticking out parallel to the ceiling and the rain was coming in one window and was being blown out the other window without even getting the bed wet. What a storm!!

Submitted by: "b.k."
I have a friend in Moraga, CA., who is an ardent wine collector. He lives in a million dollar house without a wine cellar. (That's because when he bought the house in 1967 he paid only $39,000.00 for it.) Anyway, he calculated that it was cool under the house so he stored all of his special wines in the crawl space. You guessed it, all the labels came off. Now he wants me to come down there and help him "taste" so that he can glue the labels back on the correct bottles.

rules!